G+ Migration Blog

1) I am not dead. 2) This may be a technicality. 3) Did someone get the license of that truck? It backed up several times. 4) If this is tamiflu making things better it is definitely a technicality. 5) Influenza sucks. 6) My mother helpfully announced to the universe that I may have exposed them to the flu, notwithstanding the obvious epidemiology that I obviously caught it from people/places due to the funeral and many visitors to the house for four days. 7) Widest possible window for me to pass it on is people I had contact with on Saturday. So almost none of the people she notified. 8) She did go get me ginger ale, though, so I could drink something that I could stomach. 9) I don’t think the ginger ale outweighs her total disregard for my privacy in an attempt to make herself a hero by identifying patient zero, which I am not. 10) Mom, I’ve worked with epidemiologists. I’ve known epidemiologists. I might even have been friends with an epidemiologist. Mom, you’re no epidemiologist. 1...

Oh, ok. It’s not a sore throat. It’s the actual flu. Fuck you, universe. Fuck you.

My mother has the unerring gift of shit timing.

Oh, ok. I have a really bad sore throat, now. I guess stress is not good for the immune system, eh? Also, seriously universe? SERIOUSLY?!? Not to mention feeling like I have a fever although I do not.

The hits just keep on comin’. So Fucking Tired.

Well, I only threatened to walk out of the funeral once. The proximate cause was my mother but it was really the toxic stew of my SIL’s bullshit and my mother’s codependency, etc. My sister summed it up as, “... the person whose calls you take? That’s the relationship you’re in.” She (sister) told me later that had my mother gone any words more with what triggered my taking a stand, she was also about to leave. (It was not a threat from me. I was 2 literal seconds from walking out.) We’ve decided that while empathy is over rated, my mother’s critical lack is empathy. It’s a major flaw.

I may be severely on edge. I hope I make it through the day without exploding. #statingtheobvious

That could explain a lot. https://www.wired.com/story/the-governments-new-weather-model-faces-a-storm-of-protest/ https://www.wired.com/story/the-governments-new-weather-model-faces-a-storm-of-protest/

A potato pic of the moon last night looking yuge.

So, in the new category of #funeralreadings, my sister and I were adamantly nope on psalm 23 and some other psalm - they're all god this and god that and omg fear death. Not my dad. My sister, who is knowing things, also pointed out that one of them was really in the context of a war anyway and thus questionable for funerals, really, even if it was always used out of context. So we are suggesting John Donne's: No man is an island,  entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were;  any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. instead. Just that bit, though, obs, because the entirety of the essay from which it comes is rife with god this and church that. I mean, it's John Donne. But the meaning of ...

Leigh Butler's post reminded me of this. I propose we both just meet in the quarter and get drunk listening to blues and old school jazz toasting my dad, your uncle, and the misery that is humanity. Barring that, my sister and I may have managed to remove the annoying death psalms if something secular and appropriate can be found in time. My dad was not into religion, either, in fact, kind of the opposite. We will not make too big a fuss if mom insists but we are crossing our fingers that we actually know more than she does. Mind, the officiant she chose instead of the ones dad wanted, who are "co-officiating" (sigh), did make a small protest, as in but we always say those psalms! If mom doesn't notice, too bad, so sad. We're not having the New Orleans brass band bit my dad requested because mom made it too miserable and I am not spending my time justifying other people's ignorance. Also, she's made it very clear that she doesn't want to spend time out...

You know, it’s really hard to keep it together when the receptionist who answers the phone at your father’s dentist starts crying when you tell her you’re calling to let them know he died. I mean, I know people in the office consider him a friend, it’s why I called but geez.

Oh, g+ pics are back.

You know, until my brother’s wife started all this garbage I had never attended, participated in, or personally heard of a fucked up funeral. Except for “Death at a Funeral”, which was damn funny (the original British one). Since she started causing problems and because multiple clergy are involved, I have been told that people act like assholes in and around funerals all the time. I could have lived forever without having this experience or that knowledge. Having made sure I spoke with the clergy my mother wanted involved (not their fault), she did not give specific details of what my SIL is and has been doing, just a generalized posting on the internet problem sort of thing. They now have specifics, because I’ll be damned if I let her leave wiggle room for that woman or create any impression that this is just some usual sort of dysfunction and I just don’t get along with her. I am not the problem. I am in fact one of the victims and I get to stand up for myself. Not that there isn’t ...

G+ is I guess also not sharing pics today?

Potato pic of super moon just after sunset.

Let’s play a game! When I told my mom (who opened the door to this) that when people hurt me I get to say so (to the person doing the hurting), guess what she said? No, wait. I’ll make it easy. Was she supportive, yes or no? Hint: I have been informed it is too great a burden to consider anyone else’s feelings at this time when she should be focused only on herself and her terrible loss. Translation: her feelings, my brother’s feelings, and my SIL’s feelings are terribly important. I, my sister, and my niece can go stuff ourselves because we burden her. Just for fun, later she was meandering from dealing with the now onto topics like returning urinals and after a few minutes I said that at the moment, those weren’t really things I was prioritizing. She found this problematic so I said, “At the moment, I am more concerned with mourning my father’s death.” Then I got to watch her struggle to keep her mouth shut and not say anything inappropriate to me. But she did end the conversation in...

Well done article. Science plus humor ftw. https://www.forbes.com/sites/brucelee/2019/02/17/what-push-ups-can-tell-you-about-your-cardiovascular-risk/#385b58419e66 https://www.forbes.com/sites/brucelee/2019/02/17/what-push-ups-can-tell-you-about-your-cardiovascular-risk/#385b58419e66

Oh, right. It’s Presidents Day.

And the garbage just keeps on coming. Mom caved like Chamberlain at Munich. Can’t mess with happy family fantasy or my brother’s fee fees! So I have been told to shut up and sit down because I am pressuring my mother by not saying anything directly to my SIL and deferring to my mother’s status out of respect. Per my mother my SIL claims she removed info from posts and/or removed posts. Only thing we can confirm is that she blocked my niece from her feed so now we have no way of directly verifying whether she changed or removed the posts. Because the real problem was that one of us saw her bullshit and called her out. At this point almost all trace of my father has been removed from the funeral. My mother has made it clear that she has no boundaries and is fine with my SIL taking over. Right now, I still plan to attend mostly because some other people will be there. However, I feel that I now have to speak to the funeral director and the officiants and make it clear that my SIL has deli...

Hi.

Oh HOLY idivc74:&*%|~?Gudui?!!!!! SIL posted OUR ADDRESS on INSTAGRAM with NAMES and told people to send things for my brother to our house!!! My mother is now apparently angry enough to say something to my brother and SIL but ... they aren’t answering their phones or texts ...

woof

Michigan, I am in you.

I will make a formal, public post later, I need time. However, I am livid as is my sister, niece, and even my mom (who gets a few brownie points for not thinking this was ok). So I am venting to you guys. Please use some discretion. We have not made a formal public statement. We will when we are ready. I do not know anyone who needs a formal education in etiquette to know that it is up to the primary relationship to make or not public statements about a partner illness or death. And that you take your lead and use discretion beyond that. So when my SIL decided to make a public post, with photographs, co-opting her husband’s and our and my mother’s loss/grief on fucking Facebook, which we just found out, she already earned herself the death sentence in one star system. She posted this within hours of my brother being told, afaik without telling him what she did. And it’s a real doozy of a bullshit public performance of oo, pay attention to me, look at me! post, too. But she had to go ...

I can’t wait to hear if any of this stuff is validated. #sarcasm The FBI was better off when "you all only hired Irishmen," Sessions said in one diatribe about the bureau's workforce. "They were drunks but they could be trusted. Not like all those new people with nose rings and tattoos - who knows what they're doing?" https://www.al.com/news/2019/02/sessions-said-fbi-better-off-hiring-drunk-irishmen-mccabe-writes.html?outputType=amp https://www.al.com/news/2019/02/sessions-said-fbi-better-off-hiring-drunk-irishmen-mccabe-writes.html?outputType=amp

Hey, Detroit folks. I am thinking I will come there tomorrow some time or maybe Saturday and leave maybe Monday? Anyway, I was wondering if some of you would be up for drinking a toast to my dad maybe Saturday night? One of the things I learned about my dad is that he liked good scotch and good wine and if anyone is available I’d like to buy a round in his honor. Fair warning I will probably ugly cry even if sober.

Today needs more puppies.

- locked - Continuing from yesterday, or whenever that was - my linear time sense is currently borked. I have continued to have to make terrible decisions since Saturday. And my mother has continued to be my mother. My sister and even my niece have really stepped up, though, to the max they can, which helps. I slept over in my dad's room Monday night. Hospice has very comfortable convertible bed/couch thingies. Much better than the hospital. In fact, I'd totally sleep on that thing all the time. The staff tells me that I may be in the half of people who really like them, as half really don't, but I like firm supportive beds, so. When my mom finally got there Tuesday and I was leaving, I noticed my dad had kind of drooled a little so I wiped it up before I left. As I was doing that my mom got up and stood between me and the door, sort of pinning me by the bed and asking what I was doing and why. That was weird enough, but when I said oh, I just noticed that he drooled a litt...

- locked - I've struggled with this for a while and it's never going to be concise, or 'right', or whatever so it is probably going to be long and disorganized and ranty and ugly. Just so you know what you might be getting into. I had to make the decision to send my father to inpatient hospice on Saturday. Please hateful universe that poops on good people let him die quickly, because we have nothing else left. It isn't painless, even though there is good pain control, and it's everything he feared and hated about being tortured, helpless, and trapped. He should have died multiple times before this. He had all the things that people usually use to predict that sort of thing. And then he didn't die. It even got to the point where health professionals would literally say he shouldn't still be upright, we don't get it. He didn't want to be here anymore. He's been done and ready to die for a long time. He said good-bye to people in person, on the...

And because the universe thinks it’s funny, I have a head cold and feel as expected. I am just about managing with drugs and cough drops but what I really want is a Jewish deli with chicken soup, a bed, and a television with something I’d actually like to watch. P.S. I will get none of those things. Because the universe is amoral and therefore cruel.

So, uh, I really feel like I need to post some things about status changes here in the land of sunshine and rainbows but I do not want to impose on or trigger anyone re: family, cancer, death and dying, or other not nice to talk about that topics. I should also tell you that I have not had access to counseling for something over a month. The agency through which I had accessed that is currently imploding in some kind of reorganization that has resulted in most if not all the social workers and counselors leaving and getting other jobs. So that is a thing I have been working on. Anyway, I wanted to ask before I posted anything for you to please tell me if you need me to not include you on said posts. Thanks.

Darwin says what? (I feel badly for these people and especially the poor 3 year old, but the unspoken hold my beer is headshake worthy.) Actual title: PSA the Temperature of Boiling Water has Not Changed. https://gizmodo.com/psa-the-temperature-of-boiling-water-has-not-changed-1832495197/amp https://gizmodo.com/psa-the-temperature-of-boiling-water-has-not-changed-1832495197/amp

Holy moly. The wind is so strong it pushed the lake level up 7 feet .

I find it deeply ironic that the two states besides California that have the highest vaccination rates and do not allow even religious exemption from such are Mississippi and West Virginia. New tourism slogan: Mississippi - Measles Free!

Just to add to all y’all’s amusement, The Duct Tape Conundrum. In the midst of The Case of the Sweating Pipes, my mom randomly asked me, “What is that silver electrical tape?” “Silver electrical tape? We have electrical tape but it’s black. Why?” “No, no. The silver tape.” I ask for a few more clues and realize, “Uh, do you mean duct tape?” “No, no, the electrical tape. On the mailbox.” “That’s duct tape.” “Oh. Well, do we have any?” “Yes, there should be some up here in the utility drawer.” “I didn’t see any.” “Ok, I’ll look.” Proceed to take duct tape out and give it to my mom. It turns out the high winds ripped the tape off the top of the mailbox where my father had used it as a cheap waterproof outer cover on the top of the mailbox. It also sort of reinforced it. So my mom noticed and no big that she didn’t know what it was called but she then proceeds to explain that rather than fixing it now we should wait until my brother is here later because he can fix it. Because apparently n...

Today in Adventures with Mom, who has been a home owner for 30+ years - The Case of the Sweating Pipes. I get up this morning and am regaled with Tales of a Plumbing Emergency in the basement. She has already called two companies and is thinking of calling a third if they don’t respond Right Away. Eventually, I get credible info and look and the pipes are sweating and dripping all across the basement ceiling. I say well it looks like the pipes are sweating, that’s odd. No no no! Disaster! Emergency! Ok, well we can ask the plumbers. An hour later she says something offhand about hearing water running in the basement. Upon querying it is not the creek that runs under the house that you can hear by the sump pump. No, this is something she heard and decided to dismiss over near the half bath. Except she’s sort of telling me now. So I go down and check and low and behold the toilet is running. It has probably been running for two days because that’s the last time someone likely used it. T...

Thanks for the wind! Which may be joined by lake effect snow later. #weather #thanksnothanks

No surprise. It touches both Dems and GOP. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/top-va-senator-tommy-norment-swept-state-blackface-scandal-n969021 https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/top-va-senator-tommy-norment-swept-state-blackface-scandal-n969021

Are we sure this timeline doesn’t include hallucinogens in the air and water? Should we just invest in popcorn stock? If this is a TV show, this entire season is badly written. https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e3922310f https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e3922310f

The pensive pooch. A study in canine contemplation. Zen and the art of riding in automobiles. One dog’s journey to get free biscuits from the drive through bank teller.

Hi. I am not tugging at your very being with my soulful eyes. Food is love. Feeeeed meeeee.

Had I never visited Richmond and Petersburg, I might be other than depressingly disappointed about what’s going on in Virginia. But definitely not surprised. What a bloody mess.

Can I have the cornice back? It only might have broken the window. #whinywhinyprincess #bargainingwithnature

I just love it when the forecast goes from cromulent to freezing rain in minutes. #oppositeday #grumpyoldman Update: Oh, ok weather prognosticators, now we could have freezing rain thunderstorms? Go home, weather, you’re drunk.

We’re so screwed. Edit: When we moved, physically and socio-economically, I ended up in high school with these people. While as a general philosophical thing I want people to have the opportunity to change, and statistically know that there are a few people out there that do change, these people don’t change. She is exactly who she was as a college student. The only possible way I would believe she changed is if she said, “I was wrong. This is how I was wrong, this is why I was wrong, this is how and why I would do things differently forevermore.” “And I profoundly apologize to all the people who were and are still being hurt by my ignorance and lack of insight.” These people don’t do that. They are never wrong and as long as society keeps rewarding their aggressive steamrolling of any humanity in their path with prizes like federal appointments and Supreme Court and other judgeships, they will have no incentive to change. The more we give them power, the more they will make sure they ...

Institutions that should totally be arbiters of moral authority - none. https://www.apnews.com/397f2c76afc04532908035a66ccaacc8 https://www.apnews.com/397f2c76afc04532908035a66ccaacc8

Toum baked sockeye with wild rice cooked with orange juice and dried blueberries. See, I don’t just eat ice cream. 😉

My sister was here for a day to help with my dad and instead of dinner we stress ate. She got something with fudge that’s lurking in the background. I got what I dubbed the “yellow snow”. Coconut ice cream, whipped cream, pineapple sauce. I could have made it a “white out” if it was marshmallow sauce instead but I wasn’t into the marshmallow. #adulting

I had a clever plan to take all the cars to the car wash early this morning. Karma, fate, and the universe found this very funny. Thus, I am in the interminable line at the car wash. Bets on how long this will take?

The cornice dies, not with a bang, but with a dripdripdrip, dripdripdrip, dripdripdrip.

Remember those cartoons where a cat or dog came out of the dryer? This is a Shih Tzu being blow dried at the groomer. Explains the “lion” name association.

Cornice progress update. I fully expect our driveway to become a life threatening zone tomorrow when temps go way up. This little thing in front of our house is nothing compared to what’s sliding off our neighbors’.

The cornice cometh.