Tightly locked.

Tightly locked.

I have learned that I do not deal well with mentally and emotionally ill people. Like, if I had no hope of any of this ever changing, I'd be one of those people who gave their kid or parent or whomever up to the state for care. Because otherwise there would be at least one additional person who ended up in the care of the state, i.e., me. I have so much more sympathy for people who do that, now. JFC

I just wrote and deleted a longer, more specific vent, and it's not fair for it to be forever on the internet, so it's deleted, but omg, I feel like my sanity is threatened sometimes. I also really start to understand the anger that builds up. I'm all socialized, and stuff (people took me to the dog park growing up), so nothing pathologic will happen to society at large, but it is way too easy to see how someone who doesn't have that internal structure in place takes it all out on everyone else. It's kind of terrifying, really.

I am sane. I know I am not the one with the problem, but it is so hard to deal with how much it affects me.