Things I learned today:
Things I learned today:
My mother pre-programmed me to be cowed by how to shut up a woman in a board room behaviors because she engages in those behaviors to control and shut me up. Like calling me bitchy because she doesn't like how I interacted with someone else when a man would have been called aggressive.
P.S. This is still her casting a value judgment on my behavior that is negative, even if I was a man and she called me aggressive. She doesn't get to tell me what behaviors and feelings I'm allowed to have. This isn't about social interaction, this is about stomping people to control and destroy them.
My mother admitted she is being bitchy - her words. Of course, she was trying to tear me down by saying under her breath but loud enough to hear it with her back to me that, "At least I'm not the only one who's bitchy around here." So she knows she's behaving the way she is toward everyone. Her attempts to co-opt me and tear me down are pathetic, as are any protestations that her behavior is spontaneous, stress-induced, or out of her control.
She was told what people were doing and where they were going, and asked if she wanted anything brought back for her. On our return, she separately interrogates people as to what they did and where they went (interrupting when she doesn't want to actually hear what the answers are because she already has a narrative she just wants to twist things to support). Then promptly slams things around and gets angry at all persons and states things including, "You and your father hurt my feelings." Bullshit. Nobody did anything to you. You are throwing a tantrum like a very young child, and possibly for less reason, because you have control over your life in a way no small child does.
This behavior used to work. We all used to get all concerned about oh, what did we do, how can we make it better? Now we know. We didn't do anything. You have some parallel reality in your head and you get pissed off when real reality doesn't jive with your imagination. Nobody's problem but your own.
My mother pre-programmed me to be cowed by how to shut up a woman in a board room behaviors because she engages in those behaviors to control and shut me up. Like calling me bitchy because she doesn't like how I interacted with someone else when a man would have been called aggressive.
P.S. This is still her casting a value judgment on my behavior that is negative, even if I was a man and she called me aggressive. She doesn't get to tell me what behaviors and feelings I'm allowed to have. This isn't about social interaction, this is about stomping people to control and destroy them.
My mother admitted she is being bitchy - her words. Of course, she was trying to tear me down by saying under her breath but loud enough to hear it with her back to me that, "At least I'm not the only one who's bitchy around here." So she knows she's behaving the way she is toward everyone. Her attempts to co-opt me and tear me down are pathetic, as are any protestations that her behavior is spontaneous, stress-induced, or out of her control.
She was told what people were doing and where they were going, and asked if she wanted anything brought back for her. On our return, she separately interrogates people as to what they did and where they went (interrupting when she doesn't want to actually hear what the answers are because she already has a narrative she just wants to twist things to support). Then promptly slams things around and gets angry at all persons and states things including, "You and your father hurt my feelings." Bullshit. Nobody did anything to you. You are throwing a tantrum like a very young child, and possibly for less reason, because you have control over your life in a way no small child does.
This behavior used to work. We all used to get all concerned about oh, what did we do, how can we make it better? Now we know. We didn't do anything. You have some parallel reality in your head and you get pissed off when real reality doesn't jive with your imagination. Nobody's problem but your own.
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