- mild lock -
- mild lock -
I know I would get push back about this, push back with which I obviously disagree, but while a very few details might differ, there's something very much the same about this discussion of women in the restaurant and food industry and my experiences in my field(s). It's disturbingly consonant with a few exceptions for detail. Like, going to strip clubs had (mostly) disappeared. Otoh, somebody got fired for getting arrested for fraternizing with a prostitute, so I should probably rescind that.
I have to admit that there was an incident in training where I had had it with the subtle (and not so) chauvinist shit and when somebody brought up goosing and kept that conversation going I finally grabbed one of the males by the butt, because it was a stupid conversation, it was illustrative, and I was sick and tired of it all. Wouldn't you know, they were shocked for about 1 second, and then they were all hey, hey! And I was magically respected by those bros after that, for losing my cool and being as lousy as they were. The faculty member who was part of this was super impressed with me. I was the only female of any rank (Edit: by which I mean I was the only female, period). It is one of the exceptionally rare times in my life I have ever been unprofessional. In fact, it may be the only time.
If you think years and years of that isn't toxic just because some people succeed regardless, and some people become part of the problem but they are "team players", so. Allow me to tell you it is soul-crushingly, humanity destroyingly toxic. And it is exhausting. It is death by 1000 cuts, and it will kill you.
https://www.eater.com/2018/6/21/17468790/boys-club-kitchen-culture-gabrielle-hamilton-ken-friedman-naomi-pomeroy
https://www.eater.com/2018/6/21/17468790/boys-club-kitchen-culture-gabrielle-hamilton-ken-friedman-naomi-pomeroy
I know I would get push back about this, push back with which I obviously disagree, but while a very few details might differ, there's something very much the same about this discussion of women in the restaurant and food industry and my experiences in my field(s). It's disturbingly consonant with a few exceptions for detail. Like, going to strip clubs had (mostly) disappeared. Otoh, somebody got fired for getting arrested for fraternizing with a prostitute, so I should probably rescind that.
I have to admit that there was an incident in training where I had had it with the subtle (and not so) chauvinist shit and when somebody brought up goosing and kept that conversation going I finally grabbed one of the males by the butt, because it was a stupid conversation, it was illustrative, and I was sick and tired of it all. Wouldn't you know, they were shocked for about 1 second, and then they were all hey, hey! And I was magically respected by those bros after that, for losing my cool and being as lousy as they were. The faculty member who was part of this was super impressed with me. I was the only female of any rank (Edit: by which I mean I was the only female, period). It is one of the exceptionally rare times in my life I have ever been unprofessional. In fact, it may be the only time.
If you think years and years of that isn't toxic just because some people succeed regardless, and some people become part of the problem but they are "team players", so. Allow me to tell you it is soul-crushingly, humanity destroyingly toxic. And it is exhausting. It is death by 1000 cuts, and it will kill you.
https://www.eater.com/2018/6/21/17468790/boys-club-kitchen-culture-gabrielle-hamilton-ken-friedman-naomi-pomeroy
https://www.eater.com/2018/6/21/17468790/boys-club-kitchen-culture-gabrielle-hamilton-ken-friedman-naomi-pomeroy
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