Possibly the best story I've heard about the perils of pokemon.
Possibly the best story I've heard about the perils of pokemon. On NPR, talking about playing the game and realizing that maybe, just maybe, the real world is a thing:
(He's looking at his phone, chasing pokemon.)
7:06 a.m.: ... I notice the activity in the park is particularly heavy — animated leaves dance on the map, which I take to indicate the rustling of wild Pokemon, waiting to be caught. By me.
7:07 a.m.: I enter the park and walk through it slowly, methodologically. Nothing. I stand at its center, hold my phone out in front of me, and scan the area again and again, looking for bright, animated action. Nothing. Just the dumb park, and a dumb fountain, and some women doing yoga.
Right in front of me.
Like, 8 feet. Directly in front of me.
As I stand there, holding my phone.
With the camera on.
Pointed directly at their Downward Dogs.
7:08 a.m.: Through the camera, I watch, in J-horror slow motion, as the yoga instructor turns to face me. And frowns.
7:08:25 a.m.: It occurs to me I could defuse this situation, just by being clever and disarming, viz:
OPTION A: Shrug and say, "Ha ha gotta catch 'em all, right?"
OPTION B: Point to my wedding ring and say, "No it's okay, I'm very gay."
7:09 a.m.: In the end I choose OPTION C, easily the least clever and disarming one, which is to put my phone away and stride purposefully out of the park, down the alley, and into my building.
The discussion goes on to explain his realization of just how creepy he was being, and how the best thing to do really was just walk away and hope no one called police.
Pointed at their Downward Dogs. Hah. (If you don't know, this means BUTTS.)
(He's looking at his phone, chasing pokemon.)
7:06 a.m.: ... I notice the activity in the park is particularly heavy — animated leaves dance on the map, which I take to indicate the rustling of wild Pokemon, waiting to be caught. By me.
7:07 a.m.: I enter the park and walk through it slowly, methodologically. Nothing. I stand at its center, hold my phone out in front of me, and scan the area again and again, looking for bright, animated action. Nothing. Just the dumb park, and a dumb fountain, and some women doing yoga.
Right in front of me.
Like, 8 feet. Directly in front of me.
As I stand there, holding my phone.
With the camera on.
Pointed directly at their Downward Dogs.
7:08 a.m.: Through the camera, I watch, in J-horror slow motion, as the yoga instructor turns to face me. And frowns.
7:08:25 a.m.: It occurs to me I could defuse this situation, just by being clever and disarming, viz:
OPTION A: Shrug and say, "Ha ha gotta catch 'em all, right?"
OPTION B: Point to my wedding ring and say, "No it's okay, I'm very gay."
7:09 a.m.: In the end I choose OPTION C, easily the least clever and disarming one, which is to put my phone away and stride purposefully out of the park, down the alley, and into my building.
The discussion goes on to explain his realization of just how creepy he was being, and how the best thing to do really was just walk away and hope no one called police.
Pointed at their Downward Dogs. Hah. (If you don't know, this means BUTTS.)
Judging from a quick Google search, Downward Dog doesn't look to be exactly police material. But it sounds pretty embarrassing, yeah.
ReplyDeleteMe, I generally keep my smartphone averted when passing playgrounds. That's one thing people are sensitive about around here.
Taking unsolicited pictures of women's rear ends being stuck in the air is pretty creeper/stalker-ish. He wasn't, but it looked like he was.
ReplyDeleteI remember capturing some portals in the woods west of town once when there were in fact a small number of women (why must it always be women) doing some kind of doggie style yoga mid between two of the portals. I walked all the way around the site and spent unnecessary amounts of XM rather than mingle up close with the prior occupants. But if they had become confrontational, I would probably have explained that they had chosen a site shared with another outdoors activity, rather than leaving them with the impression that I had come all the way to creep on them.
ReplyDelete