Never flip channels while bored and drooling.
Never flip channels while bored and drooling. Tripped over the Shannara TV thing and experienced an inability to move away from the trainwreck. Somebody tell me my taste in literature wasn't this bad in junior high, or maybe this is not exactly how the book goes? Don't remember, don't want to look it up. Thoughts in random order while watching:
1. Ok, I guess that's the color I thought the elfstones would be.
2. So much patriarchy.
3. High school prom girl elf fantasy.
4. Needs more pouty lips.
5. The list of fetishes just keeps growing.
6. It's not AGOT; it's a bad fanfic of a fanfic of a Twilight fanfic shot in NZ.
7. Chauvinist demons. Nice.
8. Acting! Thank god! Oh, nevermind.
9. Are all druids this hot? Sorry, I got distracted.
10. Wow, so many whiny teenagers, even the grown-ups.
11. Hey, that was almost a scene between two women!
12. Seriously? That's how you stage a fight between a druid and a demon?
There's a lot of naked, wet, wet and naked. You can show me Manu Bennett's chest again, if you want, but you don't have to. Did the book make a lot of comments about the size of elves'penises ears? Where was Buffy when the Demon was killing the high school football team? I mean, something something, Chosen. I'm pretty sure the demographic this is aimed at is between 12 and 21, is all I'm sayin', and I'm not sure they're really aiming over 18.
1. Ok, I guess that's the color I thought the elfstones would be.
2. So much patriarchy.
3. High school prom girl elf fantasy.
4. Needs more pouty lips.
5. The list of fetishes just keeps growing.
6. It's not AGOT; it's a bad fanfic of a fanfic of a Twilight fanfic shot in NZ.
7. Chauvinist demons. Nice.
8. Acting! Thank god! Oh, nevermind.
9. Are all druids this hot? Sorry, I got distracted.
10. Wow, so many whiny teenagers, even the grown-ups.
11. Hey, that was almost a scene between two women!
12. Seriously? That's how you stage a fight between a druid and a demon?
There's a lot of naked, wet, wet and naked. You can show me Manu Bennett's chest again, if you want, but you don't have to. Did the book make a lot of comments about the size of elves'
Somebody tell me my taste in literature wasn't this bad in junior high
ReplyDelete...sorry. It totally was.
If it's any comfort, so was mine. I had no taste AT ALL.
Stop elf-porn-shaming!
ReplyDelete(Yes, it really was that generibad.)
Were there all those scenes of people being naked? And sexual innuendo? I mean, I hardly remember the books at all, but wow.
ReplyDeleteThose I don't remember in shannara – it seemed very pg back in the day.
ReplyDeleteWell, it would hardly surprise me if they, ahem, spiced it up to sell it. I mean, I'd be pretty surprised if the line, "... sweaty elf boy ..." was in the original. That doesn't sound so much like a Tolkien rip off as a bow chicka bow fic.
ReplyDeleteMy bar for the series was extremely low, with it being on MTV ffs, and it has certainly plaid heavily into the demographic of people who actually watch MTV, rather than people who would have actually read the book(s). It allowed me to decide if it was a watchable show for it's own merits/flaws, and so far I don't think it's any worse than other shows I've given a decent shot, so I will continue until they have insulted me in some way. Here are some thoughts:
ReplyDelete1) With few exceptions, it is not in any way the Hildebrandt Brothers' world that I loved so much. They have taken the post-apocalyptic concept I had completely missed until someone mentioned it recently and REALLY played it up in order to appeal to their MTV/Reign/Twilight audience and I'm trying really hard to not be bitter about that.
2) I was thoroughly glad that I have not read it since grade school and couldn't pick apart every difference they made to the original, as there are many both large and small. But I am able to accept that they are taking a much more simultaneous route to the plot development.
3) I HATE that the costumes are so club-tastic-ly modern with a raging hatred. As much as I try to accept a different vision for this than what I remember as a kid, I just can't get past that one.
4) Amberle has been portrayed a lot more Katniss/Buffy-like than the book depicted, which I will accept as a good thing, even though it makes other plot points about her seem kind of like idiot-ball moments.
5)Erethya (sp?) . . . ? I'm sure other people will disagree, but that's pretty close to how I imagined her . . . a little younger, maybe (probably being skewed by how OLD I am, really) - especially her voice, which I always imagined more sultry and mature, but I didn't really care for her much other than that, at the time (I was young when I read these) it was all about the princess to me.
6) Alanon is much younger and more jarhead-like than I ever imagined, but putting as much distance between he and Gandalf (or even Dumbledore, for that matter) seems like a good idea and I think he's doing a decent job. Were the runes carved into his skin like that part of the books? I have no recollection.
And my final thought, John Rhys Davies and the elf king? WHYYYYYYYYYYYY????