I spoke with my dad.

I spoke with my dad. It seems he, my sister, and I have all talked and feel there is reason to be concerned about my mother and what she is doing in regards to my uncle. However, he is exhausted, in pain, and depressed, and literally cannot handle any more emotional trauma with my mom. Currently, my mom is trying to be supportive and caring about my dad, although no one is discussing my uncle. My dad doesn't feel he can handle speaking with the social worker, or the possible repercussions with my mom.

So, I am supposed to try to find a way to contact her social worker friend and talk to her, purely to say that we have reason to be concerned that our mom is getting herself into a situation that may be detrimental to her, and she will not hear us, but just gets angry. However, I feel like I have to ask first, assuming I can figure out how to contact her, whether it is possible to speak to her confidentially, without violating any professional ethics, and without her being obligated to talk to my mom, who will blow up and get angry at us because we are, finally, in fact going behind her back. If she blows up, my dad cannot handle this or deal with it. His mental state is critical to his ability to deal with his illness. 

Argh.